Aphorisms at 6×12 +1

If you look back at your life and have no regrets, that should be your biggest regret.

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In the past, character made heroes; today, heroes are made of characters.

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Old adage: “The only thing necessary for the triumph of evil is for good men to do nothing.”

Current adage: The only thing necessary for the triumph of good is for evil men to do nothing.

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True love makes unbearable life circumstances bearable.

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The bucket list of old age often reveals not future dreams, but past joys now out of reach.

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I’ve reached the semifinals of the senior musical chairs championship—a game where the chairs disappear, the music dies, and the last one standing still loses… just more slowly than the rest.

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My pickleball mantra (thanks to Toby Keith)

I ain’t as good as I once was, but I’m as good once as I ever was

More Aphorisms…

Hearts anchored in love never drift from safe harbors.

Forbidden pleasure is the most tempting and often the least rewarding.

Our sweetest memories often come with a silent soundtrack playing in the recesses of our minds.

Most people have two versions of their life story: the carefully edited one they share with others and the unfiltered one they revisit in solitude.

One can feel lonely even in the heart of a crowd.

To dampen a compliment for an older man, give the praise—then add, ‘for a man your age.“

In old age, memories of the past bring more joy than dreams of the future.

Life is a game of dodgeball—we duck illness, misfortune, and loss. But sooner or later, we can’t dodge the final throw: death.

Feeling 30, Living 72

I am a 72-year-old man. Often it’s hard for me to grasp how old I am. I still have this mental image of myself as a man in his 30s. My body, however, tells a different story. The thick brown hair I once had is now gray and thinning in spots. I struggle to hear people even when they’re nearby. My sleep is restless, and while I never used to nap, I now rely on them—sometimes for two or three hours in the afternoon. My face is marked with age spots, and I carry a large scar on my left leg from a cancer removal surgery 13 years ago. I even had to spend over $20,000 on new teeth so I could eat comfortably.

Still, I consider myself lucky. I am moderately active, playing competitive pickleball 3 to 4 times a week. I am not a candidate for knee or hip replacement like so many men and women my age. I still have a decent pace when I walk. I can get out comfortably from my car. With medication, my high blood pressure iand type two diabetes are under control.

Despite my current good fortune, I feel the walls of time, good health and good fortune closing in. How much time do I have before my good luck runs out? They say that there are three phases to retirement, the first is go – go; the second is slow – go and the third is no – go. I have enjoyed the first phase of retirement for about seven years. But I sense a transition is coming soon.

I grow tired quickly lately. Often what my mind and spirit conceive, my body and limited energy cannot achieve. I was once used to pushing past my limits, but now I’m learning, albeit grudgingly, to accept them.

Every day of good health and life is a blessing. I realize this can all change in a flashing moment. When I think of the future, I don’t view it as the next ten years, five years or next year, my future is now.

Great Retirement Advice

Thought provoking New York Times article What Does Retirement Really Mean? Short in length but long on wisdom…

My takeaways from the article are shown below. The first observation is what is most relevant to me at my age.

“Growing old is a process of giving things up. The trick is to not dwell on what you have lost, but rather focus on what remains.”

CONRAD REYNOLDS, CHICAGO

“Old age is like the fourth quarter of a basketball game. Time for the stars to really shine.”

HAL REICHARDT, BEAVERTON, ORE.

“The best sentiment I have heard on retirement was expressed by Serena Williams: She was not retiring from tennis, she was evolving.”

CYNTHIA WAGNER WEICK, CARMEL-BY-THE-SEA, CALIF.

“If the joy of your work has left you, it is time.”

CHRISTINE ROBB, ISLESBORO, MAINE

“I had to learn to be comfortable in the uncertainty of my future.”

PAULA SANTA-DONATO, HARTSDALE, N.Y.

Notes from Ageless Soul by Thomas Moore

Stages in the aging process

feeling immortal,
first taste of aging,
settling into maturity,
shifting toward old age,
letting things take their course.

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We can deal with this anxiety individually by living a day at a time, being present to what the day has to offer. If there is no sickness or any other problem, we can enjoy the day. Some people project themselves into a debilitating future and live in the anxiety of imagined woes to come.

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I don’t care what the calendar says. I have a strong youthful component in me, and often that person in his 40s seems to inhabit my body. Even when I look in the mirror, I sometimes manage to see more of the 40 year old man than the one who is 76. I’ve always been a strong believer in illusions.

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Simple, ordinary activities can improve your health and ease the black bile of melancholy that afflicts many older people. Take that walk in the woods, look for a sparkling lake or river, and don’t spend much time with negative people. We don’t realize how important it is to rely on nature for our health and mood, to think about the kind of people we have around us, and to understand the value of gardens and trees.

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The older years offer a perfect time to reflect more often, more deeply and more seriously on these important aspects of life. Of course, we need to begin this kind of reflection in our youth, but it can reach its depth in old age. Being part of a culture that has lost interest in profound ideas and intense reflection on experience makes aging more difficult.

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Being an elder not only helps other people find guidance and wisdom, but it also gives the older person added reason for living. It may be the final act of a generous and thoughtful life. It is service taken to the last moment and done with a special authority and dedication it helps if the older person consciously adopts the role of elder. I could say from my own experience that a certain point people begin to treat you as an elder and look for benefits that you may be able to give them.

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The poet Maya Angelou once wrote: “I’ve learned that people will forget what you said, people will forget what you did, but people will never forget how you made them feel.” Thus legacy is a matter of the heart. It’s not an idea but a feeling connected to largely invisible people, it’s a special way of loving, and if there is anything that could make growing old more pleasurable, it would be to discover new ways to love.

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Reflection – – the first stage for an ordinary person is reading or listening to someone else offer an understanding of events. You listen or read and make those ideas your own in your own way. The second stage of reflection is conversation. You make a point to speak with people who have something worthwhile to say and with whom you enjoy speaking. A third stage of reflection is to find some effective mode in which you can express yourself it could be writing of various forms – – journals poems, essays, fiction…

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My Review of the Book

I am a bit of a cynic. Books like these discussing getting older are often written with the goal to alleviate the concerns and fears of elderly people as they approach death. The objectives when you get into your 70s and 80s are to find interests and things that will motivate you to stay alive or at least maintain your enthusiasm for healthy living.

While one can try to maintain a healthy attitude about life in your 70s and 80s, what’s more important are the states of your mind and your body. It’s critically important that you are not alone and that you do have some type of social network that hopefully includes family and friends.

It’s a comforting book with some useful bromides about topics like overcoming melancholy and leaving legacies. I don’t think there is one philosophy or set of rules to follow in life after 70. One of the things that I try to adjust to is the declining control I have in the direction of my life. I don’t have the physical, intellectual or mental energy I had a year ago and I expect that to continue to decline.

My five worst fears as I get older:

Losing my wife
Loneliness
Dementia
Disabilities and loss of health
Running out of money

Equanimity

“True equanimity arises when we embrace the flow of life without being swept away by its currents.” – Ram Dass

In memory of two high school classmates who recently died…

As we grow older, we descend like a starship pulling from the gravity of our youthful endeavors, and settle into the “orbit of mortality.”

The sounds of ocean waves lapping along the shore, like hymns from a church organ evoke peace and soulful contemplation.

There is no better sedative than sitting on the couch, cool drink in hand and dozing off to one of my wife’s Hallmark movies.

How I look forward to summer! By July 1, how I look forward to autumn!

My True Confession: I never flirted with a woman I desired. AI version: Desire unspoken, a confession true: I never flirted, yet yearned for you.

Three mindsets of a life long athlete: in youth, WIN; in good health, COMPETE; in old age, PARTICIPATE.

I was surprised to hear of the current writers’ strike in movies and TV. Based on what I view on the screen, I thought their work stoppage began in 1990.

Future historians will equate January 6, 2021 as this era’s Fort Sumter, the start of a new civil war.

This Could Be The Last Time

Well, this could be the last time

This could be the last time

Maybe the last time

I don’t know

The Last Time by the Rolling Stones

Once I lived in a time of firsts, first grade, first date, first kiss, first love, first job, first house… Youth created the illusion of an unlimited future and an infinity of repeat experiences, opportunities and time.

Now I exist in a time of lasts, last job, last meeting, last look, last conversation, last vacation, last healthy day, last goodbyes, last breath… Realities of limited time and few opportunities…No guarantees that tomorrow will be the same as today. Or that I may have a tomorrow. Moments may never repeat. Family and friends may leave me. Or I leave them.

Mullings of a Mature Man

Senior citizens are like older cars without a gas gauge. Both have travelled many miles and not sure how much time or travel is left.

As years grow, handshakes, hugs and kisses among friends and family are longer.

Photo by Pixabay

Those who are truly happy, if offered a chance to enter a time machine and go back to relive their lives, would decline and say, “I would not change a thing.”

Emptying contents from my mom’s home of 54 years, I sensed fond memories of my youth following them solemnly from the house to the truck taking them away.

One’s definition of “success’ matures with age. Success becomes not so much in what we have but what we contributed with what we had.

If you still believe in 75% of the things you learned or were told in the first 25% of your life, you haven’t been paying attention.

Retirement Challenge

The challenge of retirement is adapting to getting older but not getting “old.”
EAB